Saturday, September 10, 2011

Why I Am A Feminist - III

(An old draft that I'd never completed)

Or, Unmana ko gussa kyon aata hai, as a friend once put it.

I get angry easily. I am impatient. I lose my temper, I lash out, I shake, I cry. Here are some of the things that make me angry.

Men who make sexist statements while pretending to be only logical. Who pretend to be allies. Who think women should be equal only if it's convenient to men. Who think women should be barred certain jobs because, oh, men might harass them. Funnily, none of these men ever suggest marriage should be banned: though aren't so many women abused by their husbands and in-laws? Oh no, but that might inconvenience men. (I'm not saying women don't make sexist statements, but it's when men do it that I'm angrier. Because the oppressors have no right to tell the oppressed what kind and measure of equality they should ask for.)

Men who refuse to consider me as a person because I am a woman. Back when I was in Gurgaon and used to take the office cab to work, the cabwallah would ask me for directions until a man got into the car, and often ask the man for directions to my house. And which woman hasn't had repairmen, or salesmen or other such men ignore her while he talks to the man beside her, assuming that he knows more or he's in charge?


Anonymous said...

Oh yes, that is regular, ignoring the woman, and asking the male, even if he is her younger son, for permission or approval for something that concerns her. Those comments by the so-called logical person were farcical.

starry eyed said...

I agree 200%. It makes me angry too to be dismissed or put one (or more) steps down. There's nothing motr annoying than being clubbed as one of the "ladies" esp when all matters domestic and subservient are assigned to the ladies by the "gentlemen". I remember once in a dharna protesting contaminated water in the building, an elderly guy was yelling at the person-in-charge, "Can you look these kids in the face, they are all getting sick, can you face these ladies?" What about the fathers of those children??

The audacity of that taxi driver.

Unmana said...

Batul and Starry: Thank you both very much! I'm so glad I know you and people like you.

Gayatri said...

- I am with u :)
- Am not starting my never ending list....:D

~G said...

Men making sexist statements angers your more? For me it is the women who act so subservient and dependent on men to the extent of being spoken for.