Monday, June 28, 2010

What Women Want: No, I'm Not Telling You

I can tell you what I want - but I might not, unless I trust you. Why do you think I can tell you what all women want?

Some women want time to themselves. Some want meaningful work. Some want a new haircut. Some want to find love. Some want their in-laws to treat them better. Some want to do well in their exams. Some want more money.

Some want women to be treated equally. Some think they are equal enough. Some like the place the patriarchy allots them. Some want sons. Some want to wear skirts.

Some want to have sex. Some want to not have sex. Some want an end to sexual harassment. Some want equal pay. Some want to walk on the streets safely.

Some want their daughters dead. Some want to not have to pay dowry. Some want a foreign holiday. Some want a perfect wedding. Some want to live with the woman they love.

Some want to drive. Some want to write. Some want to whistle. Some want to play sports.

Some want a promotion. Some want to govern the country. Some want to reach space. Some want to stay home and take care of their children.

Some want to never have children. Some want to get well. Some want better access. Some want to watch a movie. Some want fresh flowers in the living room.

Some want to not be raped. Some want to not be cut. Some want to abuse a younger friend. Some want an education.

But why do you want me to tell you? Because you think women are difficult puzzles, if you've solved one, you've solved them all? Because it's too much effort to ask the women in your life what they want, and to listen when they tell you?

19 comments:

starry eyed said...

Yeah, it's like we're this whole class of people who're supposed to think alike. Good post, loved it!

Sujeet Pillai said...

Nice!!

indianhomemaker said...

Loved it!!! Buzzed, Tweeting now.

A Line of Thought said...

Loved it totally! Following IHM in tweeting :)

The Bald Guy said...

I clicked on some of those links. Some like the Congo one's were downright scary and ruthless. Sharing this.

Sameera said...

Nice post!!!!

dipali said...

Absolutely brilliant, Unmana.

Deborah said...

Lovely post. Tweeted.

UmaS said...

Loved this post !!! Exactly, if one cannot ask the woman in life, what he wants, whats the point in knowing about others !!!

Monika said...

brilliant...

Unmana said...

Thank you so much, everyone. IHM, Deborah, Bald Guy: Thanks for sharing.

New visitors: welcome! Hope you'll come back often.

Ritu said...

I love this. You read my mind!

batulm said...

Fabulous post, Unmana. You hit the nail on the head. Particularly loved the last lines.

bhagwad said...

I agree that the topic of "What women want" has been overused. What does anyone want? I'm not sure that women are any different from men in complexity of desires...

Unmana said...

bhagwad: Exactly. Women are people too, and I shouldn't need to point it out.

Shail said...

Now THAT is a question : "Because it's too much effort to ask the women in your life what they want, and to listen when they tell you?" Loved it.

Sumedha said...

I love this post. It's brilliant! Women are all different, they all want different things. When I told a friend that I don't want to have kids, he gave me the example of another woman who had said the same thing and now has 3 kids.

So? We're not the same person! Maybe she changed her mind and I won't! Maybe I will change my mind, but that doesn't mean that the next woman who says she doesn't want kids will change her mind too. We're all different people with different desires and different beliefs!

Unmana said...

Shail: Thank you.

Sumedha: I had something similar said to me too, only in my case it was: she waited too long and now she's having problems conceiving. I didn't ask for advice, did I?

Indian Home Maker said...

Congratulations :) This post in one of the winners of 'Tejaswee Rao Blogging Awards - 2011' (TRBA 2011). We would like to create an ebook with all the winning entries in 47 categories on Feminism and Gender Issues in India (and one category on Animals Rights). Please do let us know if you are fine with your winning post/s being included in this ebook. ( Please click here to let us know).