Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Things the Guy Has Done for Me

Most of you seem to want to love reading about the Guy, given that this is the most searched label on my blog. (And the fact that that label has the most posts might say something about me too.) So I picked up this tag, and will now reveal to you lucky people five great things that the Guy has done for me.

First. Back when we were in bschool, the Guy rescued me once from the worst state I've ever been in. That seems melodramatic, especially as there was nothing physically wrong with me that day. But this was some time after my dad's death, and I felt like I had plunged into dark despair. I had this insane urge to just walk off, out of my room, till the familiar streets ended, walk off into darkness and oblivion. I also had some vague idea of stepping onto the street in front of a moving vehicle, I think. As I wasn't completely insane, I reached out for help, realising that I needed someone to hold on to, to just talk to or sit by. And the Guy came when my then-boyfriend was too busy, he recognised the tinge of despair in my voice as soon as I said 'Hello' when my boyfriend talked to me about what he was doing for a few minutes without noticing anything amiss. The Guy came. He took me out and sat with me and talked to me while I cried in a busy crowded eatery, and this undemonstrative being showed little signs of discomfort. He shook me out of my depression by the means he knew best: by making me laugh. I know he would have done as much for any friend, but I was grateful then and am now.

Second. Soon after we realised we were probably falling in love, I insisted to the Guy that he needed to come and visit me because I couldn't decide whether to be with him without meeting him first. So much had changed since we had last met that I needed to see this new Guy and talk to him face-to-face to understand whether I should be with him. I was being unreasonable and childish, but the Guy understood and visited within a few days.

Third. He initiated the merging of our finances and of our lives. He started talking of how much money 'we' had coming in in the current month, and the different things 'we' needed to spend on. I was changing jobs and moving to be near him, and the move was taking up a lot of money - the Guy's support at the time helped me feel I was doing the right thing. (You might feel this is a small thing, but to me a person's attitude towards money signals a lot, and by these gestures the Guy signalled how important I was to him.)

Fourth. When I changed jobs last year, the Guy made the move so much easier. He suggested we move nearer my office, and we went house-hunting. For that one or two weeks until we moved, he drove me to and picked me up from office nearly every day, even though my office was much further away from home than his. He handled most of the moving hassles, and encouraged me to focus on my new job.

Fifth. When my job stressed me out and when I was ill, he tried hard to take care of me. He would usually fix breakfast for us when I got up, and cook and pack me lunch before we left for work. He would drop me at my office - which was now on the way to his - and then pick me up again in the evening. He would bring me home and cook us dinner. He would buy fruits, and cut them and serve them to me or pack them to carry to my workplace to make sure that I had them. He took care that I was taking my medicines. Quite a few times, he worked from home or took a break from office to come and look after me or take me to the doctor. He did all of this even while his work wasn't going that smoothly and he was working long hours. This Guy who says his favourite activity is sleeping - he did without a lot of sleep so that I could rest a little longer.

Sixth. (I'm taking six because it's been just about six years that I've known him.) He isn't very keen on gifts and surprises. He picks up stuff for me when he's travelling, but he rarely bothers to cook up a surprise on a special occasion. (This has rubbed off on me - I rarely bother either any more. Instead, I ask him what he wants to do.) But last time, as he was away, he tried to make my birthday truly special. I received not one, but two surprises! From a Guy who had to be nudged to buy me cake or a present the previous two years.

It's been six years, so let me give a quick summary of how it's been.

Year One: We started to know each other and gradually became friends.
Year Two: Our friendship grew complicated; we tried to sort out our feelings for each other, and finally agreed not to be in touch.
Year Three: We connected again and finally decided we wanted to be together; I moved cities to be with him.
Year Four: We got married and came to know each other's families; we travelled together.
Year Five: We grew even more comfortable with each other,we spent almost all our time together; the Guy went away for a month and we found it a difficult time.
Year Six: We went through difficult times and grew up a little more as a result; we bought a house together!

We have taken to completing each other's sentences, now. I know what sad joke he is going to make before the words leave his mouth. We are growing comfortable and boring.

But there's so much yet to do, so much to see. The journey is unpredictable, at least my companion is someone I know and trust.


Chicu said...

hats off to the heroes of our travelogues- those endearing beings we cannot do without.

Pallavi Sharma said...

Awww. And yay to you both for investing time and effort into this beautiful relationship.

Anonymous said...

nice post!! really want to see a picture of u and the guy now.

Unmana said...

chicu: I don't wear hats - maybe I can raise a toast instead. ;-)

Pallu: Thank you.

Lost: Not happening on this blog! :-)

Nitu Saksena said...

Wish you a great life ahead with The Guy.

dipali said...

He sounds wonderful, Unmana!
May you always be happy together, God bless the two of you.

Unmana said...

Nits: Thank you.

Dipali: He is! And thanks for your wishes.