Sunday, February 01, 2009

It has been three years

... since I moved to the city. It seems especially apt to note it here, as I had recorded it here when I had been here for three months.

I moved to a job I really wanted and was very excited about. But the reason I had considered looking for a job in this city I had never even visited was my budding relationship with the Guy.

The Guy and I had been friends for a couple of years, and the transition to a romantic relationship seemed weird to me. I had always believed that your significant other should be your best friend, but having a friend you are comfortable with and had never thought of in sexual or maybe even romantic terms (it would probably have seemed absurd) suddenly changed to the role of boyfriend was slightly unsettling. We knew each other well by then and were sure we wanted to be together, yet we were both circumspect enough to want to live near each other for a while instead of just continuing with the long-distance relationship.

The job just fell into place. I had wanted to move from my research job into marketing. I looked up the Guy's company website without much hope, and to my surprise found a marketing/content writing position. Getting that job and being near the Guy pretty much made up my definition of heaven, at the time.

Three years seems like a long time to live together. After all, we had only known each other for about two years when we got together, only three years when we got married. Yet when I look back, I can see that our relationship has grown - slowly, almost imperceptibly - in this time. We are more comfortable, probably happier, yes. We have also changed in subtle little ways. The Guy has grown more expressive, more openly romantic and affectionate. I am less edgy, more at peace, and - hopefully - more patient.

We struggle to find our perfect balance. We love spending time together, yet we do want to do different things as well. There just doesn't seem to be enough time in the week. We love going out, eating out, yet we also love sitting comfortably in our new home and talking or watching a movie toether. Each of us need some time alone, some time to think about the work that is so important a part of each of our lives, some time to think about the few other people in our lives.

But when the struggle ends, will we not stop growing?


workhard said...

Hey thats really nice, wish you a very happy married life

BPO work from home

Anonymous said...

"The Guy has grown more expressive, more openly romantic and affectionate. I am less edgy, more at peace, and - hopefully - more patient."

hey is that true for every couple?!?! cuz i feel the same! :)))

lovely write up and wishing you the very best together!!! always!!

and and and i can post now. yay! :)

Pallavi Sharma said...

You only stop growing when you stop thinking about it. Or actually spend so much time growing up that you don't have time to think about it. Otherwise it's cool :)

Unmana said...

Workhard: Thanks for all the comments, but what's with that link?

Roopscoop: (Did I mention I love your profile name?) Glad you can post now. That last tweak I did must have done it.

Pallu: Okay, that was way too profound for me.

dipali said...

Beautiful post. Growing together is always a challenge, always enriching, and , according to me, the ultimate 'work in progress'.
Be happy, both of you, always.
You are tagged.

Unmana said...

Dipali: Thank you. I'm overwhelmed by all the wishes.

Where's the tag? I can't seem to find it on your blog.

dipali said...

The post had been misbehaving- its up now!